The development of shale oil is of considerable strategic importance, particularly concerning national security implications. Effective management is vital to maximize both efficiency and socio-economic benefits. This process necessitates addressing four critical relationships: balancing local and global factors, reconciling universality with particularity, integrating inheritance with innovation, and resolving primary and secondary contradictions. These relationships pose several management challenges that must be overcome to develop a robust management model for shale oil extraction. This paper uses the Gulong shale oil in the Daqing oilfield as a case study to examine the implications and specific manifestations of these relationships. To address the limitations of traditional management models, which often overly emphasize local factors, particularity, innovation, and secondary contradictions, we have developed the “Integrated Dialectical Four-Domain Coupling Management Model.” This model incorporates systems engineering theory into management strategies. Key strategies include the global deployment of experimental zone construction, systematic geological and engineering integration, combining historical practices with innovative approaches, phase analysis, and contradiction coordination. These strategies have significantly advanced the development of Gulong shale oil, demonstrating positive on-site results. The innovative management processes detailed in this paper provide valuable insights applicable to similar reservoirs and other large-scale engineering management projects.